The Blog

Have you ever sat around eating carrots when suddenly you got to the point where there were too many carrots going in and some of the partially chewed carrots got lodged in your throat? There was some kind of logjam effect and you couldn’t seem to get all the carrots you had put in since the log jam to go down. Panic set in and you wished you hadn’t been eating baby carrots because if you had been eating regular carrots, you could have used a really long one as a sort of broom handle to plunge the carrot mass down your throat. Since you were eating baby carrots, all you could do was sit there and “blorp,” thinking about how to make sure you told everyone important that you loved them and how to make sure all your possessions got properly distributed after your demise. Then the carrot jam righted itself and slipped effortlessly down your esophagus and all was right with the world again. You sat there, thinking about what just happened, and then, like a mindless chimp, you went back to work, forgetting all that you just learned about carrots and mortality.

I have.